Today’s Old School Thursday Review comes from a Scooby Doo aficionado who refuses to tell all of you “meddling kids” my true identity—not even for a handful of #ScoobySnacks, so don’t try that distracting doggy-dance with me. Just know that I’m determined to kidnap all of the members of the Blog Tour de Force’s “Masquerade” event before the week is through, and I think that Mr. Wickles got the shaft in that Black Knight episode.
What have I done with Jeremy, you ask? Bwahh haa haa! #evillaughter. My lips are sealed on that one, but I will tell you that he is chained up along with Velma. #zoiks. Speaking of shafts, I threw Fred down a deep one in the old mine that the freaky Miner Fortyniner haunts under Gold City—good riddance to Fred! I hope the Miner Fortyniner finds him alone in the dark and adds him to the dearly departed list. #spooky
So, are you and that pretty little Daphne chic sneaking around in The Mystery Machine, listening to some groovy music while trying to figure out who I am under this mask? Well, you better put your heads together and see if you can bribe Shaggy and Scooby to join you, because you’re going to need all of the help you can get to nail those extra Kindle entries for every correct guess you make this week?
What’s that? You need a couple more clues before you can make your guess? I’ve already given you seven, which I think was downright kind of me. Maybe you’d better dig out that treasure map, retrace your steps, and spend a day reading Jeremy’s fun book, Toonopolis: Gemini. If you want to hear more about Toonopolis: Gemini, you can read reviews from his tour sponsors here: Book Bags and Cat Naps, Bookworm Castle, and Fans of Fiction.
But watch out for Charlie the Robot and that sinister Ghost Clown #creepy. I spied both of them at the Funland Circus, chasing away nosy kids like you. #troublemakers
What’s that? Why am I determined to rid the blogosphere of all of the authors in this week’s Blog Tour de Force’s Masquerade? Because their books are too darn good for my comfort. How is a shady character like me supposed to succeed as an evil masterminded author when these writers come along and mess everything up? Captain Cutler’s Ghost and I have plans. Big plans to steal that Kindle the IBC folks think they are giving away at the end of this tour.
Then along dances Amber Scott with her mesmerizing Soul Search book, sniffing where she shouldn’t be sticking her nose. Next comes Lacey Weatherford (The Demon Kiss) #witchy, Augusto Pinaud (The Writer) #secrets, and Elena Gray (Widowmaker) #wild—all three authors are determined to uncover my best laid plans for devilry and debauchery. Vickie Keire tosses her #exciting Gifts of Blood next on the alter; meanwhile, Rachel Thompson and Kelli McCracken are over there spinning their web about The Evil Within #wicked.
As if that wasn’t enough of a distraction from my evil deeds, I have to try my best to ignore several more talented authors: Belinda Boring with her Cherished #werewolves; Ann Charles and her Dance of the Winnebagos #humanbones; Maxwell Cynn with The Collective #chillingthriller; M. Todd Gallowglas and his First Chosen #darkgodofvengeance; and Jackie Chanel with Change of Heart #heartmatters.
You thought I’d give away my identity by leaving my name off of the list of other authors, didn’t you? #moreevillaughter. No, I’m not as stupid as Zeb Perkins and his idiot pal, Zeke, when they were looking for the sunken armored car. You’re going to have to work for this one. And don’t count on Shaggy and Scooby to help you stumble onto the truth, I’ve put the Ghost of Redbeard on their tails.
But I will give you one more hint: Just like Johnny Cash sings, “I’ve been everywhere, man.”
Now guess away, you interfering kids, because every commenter gets a free ebook of Jeremy’s Toonopolis: Gemini. You heard me: EVERY commenter. Be sure to leave your email address, too, so that Jeremy can let you know when his next Old School review hits his website.
Your comments will also enter you into Jeremy’s to-die-for prize package called “Cartoons Through The Years,” which includes one (1) Looney Tunes Golden Collection DVD set, one (1) Animaniacs Volume 1 DVD set, and one (1) autographed hardcover copy of Toonopolis: Gemini, Jeremy’s Kindle bestselling cartoon novel. Each commenter will receive one entry into a drawing by Random.org’s random number selector for the prize package.
Now get on outta here before I sic my attack dog on you. But leave that bag of Scooby snacks, unless you want me to set free the Mummy of Ankha to wrap you up tight and drag you off to where I’m hiding Jeremy.