Creator: Matthew Elliott
Name: Dirk Crimson
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Height/Weight: 6'2"/190 lbs.
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Real Name: Dirk Crimson
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Race: Human
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Age: 29
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Style: Drunken Barfighting
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From: New York City, NY
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Weapon: Dirk uses his fists first and foremost in battle. Aside from that, he's always ready to bludgeon his opponents with whatever blunt object he has onhand.
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Theme: "The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies" by the Vandals
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Description: Dirk Crimson is moderately tall, and rests comfortably on that line between being thin and being fat. I believe it's called Pudginess. His skin is pale because he spends most of his time indoors, and his dark hair is generally awry because most of that time he spends indoors is spent asleep. He dresses in grayscale, wearing cargo pants and a vest, both of which are covered in pockets, all of which are filled with Stuff. His eyes are always covered with a shiny silver visor, and he always wears a backpack to his fights.
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Attitude: Dirk Crimson is, in every possible way, an eight year old boy. Well, in every possible way except for the fact that he's an almost thirty year old man. Most times, Dirk is entirely pleasant to be around. He's kind and charming and fun (and kind of dumb). He's a Nice Guy. But when things don't go his way, he gets bitter, resentful, and he throws tantrums. Dirk eternally goes through mood swings, from being proud and egotistical, to being depressed and resentful, to being bored and apathetic.
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Strengths: Dirk can be quick and strong if he manages to stay concentrated on the match. Also, his backpack conceals an extensive cache of homemade weaponry, which has the capacity to be both powerful and erratic.
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Weaknesses: Because Dirk's success in the ring requires him to be just inebriated enough, becoming either too sober or too intoxicated can cause him problems. His tendency to showboat and lack of mental fortitude can also be exploited.
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Finishing Move: The Drunken Rage [If Dirk is backed into an especially tight corner, there's a good chance his beer muscles will kick in. He'll freak out and pulverize his opponent by any means possible.]
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Origin: When Officer Marcus Schmitstenstein's wife was murdered, he sank into a depressed hermitage full of cartoons and alcohol in his lonely New York City apartment. He was fired from job and wasted his days drowning his sorrows in cheap beer that he was able to afford with severance pay and unemployment checks.
Things grew much worse when Dirk decided to stop sleeping altogether. His sanity deteriorated, and he created for himself an alter ego - The Magnificent Dirk Crimson. Dirk Crimson would be a Champion for Justice and a Hero for the Masses. He imagined a sidekick for himself, a white rabbit he named Schmitty.
Because there were no witnesses at the time, and because neither he nor Schmitty recall what happened, there is no record of how Dirk Crimson was transferred from the Real World into the Tooniverse. The Landlady of Marcus Schmitstenstein's building did, however, eventually find the charred, rotting corpse of Marcus Scmitstenstein in his apartment, with his foot through the screen of his television.
Since his arrival in the Tooniverse, Dirk Crimson has carved a niche for himself in Toonopolisian society. Dirk was able to found his own brewing company, and Crimsonbrau™ is currently being served in well over half of Toonopolis's pubs and fine dining establishments. When it initially opened, Schmitty persuaded Dirk to join the TFW as a means of seeking excitement and income. With the reincarnation of the TFW, Dirk has rejoined in the hopes of regaining the excitement he experienced the first time around.
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Manager
Name: Schmitty
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Height/Weight: 2'3"/18 lbs.
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Race: White Rabbit
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Description: The Rabbit is a staple of the Cartoon Universe. They are small, fluffy, and blessed with scathing wit. Schmitty exhibits, at all times, approximately two out of three of these traits.
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Attitude: Schmitty is the Ponch to Dirk's Judy, the Hardy to Dirk's Laurel, the, I dunno, Moe to Dirk's Larry and Curly. Schmitty is loud and irritable and largely responsible for Dirk's continued involvement in the TFW. While he's not a whole lot smarter than Dirk, he's under the impression that he is, and he makes sure that Dirk is under that impression, too. Despite the fact that they're eternally quarreling, neither of the pair is psychologically capable of sustaining themselves on their own, so it's unlikely that they will let anything substantial come between them.
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Origin: In the latter years of Dirk's life in the Real World progressed, his mental state was in constant decay. At some point that he's not entirely sure of, he started hallucinate a small white rabbit to be a companion in his self-made hermitage. When he crossed into the Tooniverse, however, that rabbit became Real. Now, Schmitty is Dirk's closest (and at most times, only) friend. Schmitty helped Dirk get on his feet when he first arrived in Toonopolis, persuaded him to join the TFW, and supports him as much as possible. Schmitty usually sits ringside for Dirk's fights, where he radiates verbal abuse and occasionally attempts to lend Dirk a hand.
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Fight History
Show
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Fight
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Result
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Record
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Show
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Fight
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Result
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Record
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Episode 2
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v. Caiaphas Rex
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Win
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1-0-0
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Episode 3
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v. Kid Gemini
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Win
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2-0-0
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Episode 4
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Maelstrom
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n/a
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2-0-0
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Episode 5
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All the Lost Marbles
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n/a
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2-0-0
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Episode 6
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v. Cal
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Draw
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2-0-1
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Episode 7
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w/ Alan Frost v. Cal/Milo
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Win
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3-0-1
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Episode 8
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v. Alan Frost
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Win
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4-0-1
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Episode 9
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v. Troble
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Win
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5-0-1
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Episode 10
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v. Purple Monkey Dishwasher
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Loss
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5-1-1
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Episode 12
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v. Lil' Devil
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Loss
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5-2-1
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First Movie
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v. Cal/Schmitty
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Win
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6-2-1
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Episode 14
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v. PMD v. Cuddles v. Angel
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n/a
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6-2-1
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Episode 24
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w/ Cal v. Faze/Diane
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Loss
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6-3-1
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Episode 27
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v. El Diablo
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Win
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7-3-1
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Episode 28
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All The Lost Marbles 3
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Win
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8-3-1
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Episode 29
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v. Chowzer
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Loss
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8-4-1
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Episode 29
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v. Nything
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Win
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9-3-1
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Episode 29
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v. Areina Tarehn
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Win
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10-3-1
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Episode 30
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v. Akemirou Ronin
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Win
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11-3-1
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